Youth Camp 2013

God told me a couple things about Youth Camp walking in. I knew that this Youth Camp was going to be different, and I also knew he was preparing me for it.

For those of you who don't know what Youth Camp is, Covenant Fellowship Church has a retreat for the youth every years where all the youth travel down to the Poconos for a few days, split into a number of colored teams, and complete in sports and learn more about God via messages, discussion, and worship.

It was the third day and the rest of the week we needed to practice skits in the afternoon during the leader meetings. Instead, we had free time during the third day, and I was left in charge of our team. So I looked after my team making sure they weren't left alone, etc. and then Joel also asked that Steven and I made sure that everyone was involved and wasn't left by themselves. So I did and at the beginning of formation I was making my way over to "formation," and cringe as I notice that Mr. Everett, camp commander assistant, has our banner. Cue: stomach plunge. Right before then, I'd been talking to Grant, so as I was walking into the message I'm still talkin with him, only taking a few moments to apologize to my teammates. 

They just shrug it off, of course. It's not that big of a deal. It's just the banner. And I know that, but for some reason I feel condemned by it, which is an experience I haven't felt for a long time. If anything, I normally struggle with apathy toward failure, and now I feel like I've failed my team, like I'm totally incompetent and useless, and I didn't actually do anything wrong! But I can't even lead my team for half an hour without losing our banner. I feel like I've lost something more than a banner. So, as I walk in, there's Joel Shorey, camp commander, waving our banner back and forth across the stage like a mad man to the intro music. Of course he puts punishment off till the next morning, and I'm irritated with Joel, thinking, "Great thanks Joel, now I'm really going to be able to worship." 

So, the first song begins to play and I can't focus on worshiping. I'm too overburdened by this sense of immense failure, so I go to the bathroom, get a drink of water while quieting my heart and return to my chair. As I stand there, feeling the weight of the world on my shoulders, the song finishes, and I can sort of engage in the next one. Then Grant, my brother-out-law, gives a prophecy and the essence is this "You've been chosen by God. Chosen for great works, leadership, to build a temple for my father." In that moment God just opened up my heart and I suddenly realized. The word that echoed in my head was no longer failure, or loser, or incompetent, but instead "unworthy." I realized how great He is, how kind he is, how unworthy I am, and His love for me all the same. This love overwhelmed me, and I was filled with adoration. But God wasn't done. Next, Mr. Welch got up and started speaking. His prophecy was different, designed for followers, but this one spoke to the belonging of a man in the army of God, and I knew that I was that man, despite my flaws. The next song starts, and, lo and behold, it's Revelation Song, one of my favorite songs about God's glory. I tap Seth, my team leader, on the shoulder and go out into the aisle, fall on my knees, and worship God, my heart filled with adoration. Near the middle of the song, I looked over and there's Sean Myers next to me, my old pink team worship buddy, and the two of us poured our hearts to our God. Worship ends, we returned to our seats, and one of the most incredible message  I've ever heard was preached. The Gospel, essentially, but passionate and wonderfully articulated.

Afterwards, Joel told us things would be different for ministry time. This time, team members will pray for one another. So, we gathered in a circle and laid hands on one anothers' shoulders, praying. This is
where I cut back to the beginning. Things were going to be different, and God was preparing me.

Jeremy's healing has been on the back of my heart for a long time and this week it was on the forefront. I had watched a video at a youthgroup in Media about people healing at a football game, and part of me was cynical about it being used as a "party trick," but the other part knew that there was no reason God couldn't do that now. So as we finished praying, Mr. Orlando came up to me and started to prophecy over me. He prophecied a number of things, but he ended it with this "I feel like you are meant as a leader, and even right now, you should be out there praying for others, giving words, and encouraging them." I knew he was right, and God had filled me with his spirit again. In fact, he hadn't left since worship. I was in tears as I went to pray for Sam Heidengren. I prayed for him, communicating God's love for him. 

After I finished, Jeremy walked about and prayed for him and I stood back, but I knew God had been calling me to pray for Jeremy's healing. However, part of me also knew, it had to be on ministry night, for some inexplicable reason. So as he was praying I laid my hands on his shoulders and I was basically doing a two step, I was so impatient for him to stop praying so I could pray for him. Meanwhile, God's spirit overwhelmed me like tidal waves rolling over me, wiping away what remained of any selfish ambition or doubt, as he'd already filled me with a sense of unworthiness. I planned to ask Jeremy if I could pray for his knees, but instead, as I tapped him on the shoulder and he turned around, I fell at his feet and put my hands on his knees and began to pray.

"God, you love this man greatly, and you have filled him with great wisdom. I know that I am not worthy of anything, or any power, but God glorify yourself and send your spirit into him and heal him Father in the name of your son Christ Jesus. Make his outside reflect his inside Father. God, make this man walk. God, make this man run. Make this man fly, God! I pray that you would heal him in the name of our savior, in Jesus's name, amen."

I felt a weird tingling on my hands, like they were numbing, and as I prayed for him, sobbing between words, I could just feel the doubt radiating off of him. So, as I finished praying, I hugged him and then moved to pray for someone else. Right then, Cajua walked over. I'm not sure why he was there, because he was supposed to be praying with his team, but I said to him, "Cajua, I think God wants to heal Jeremy. If you would pray for him, I would be so grateful." He affirmed he would, and then I moved on and prayed for others. Conner got saved that night, and as I walked over to him to pray for him, I didn't know what I was going to pray. I felt like God had already done whatever it was, so I was blanking then I began to speak, and told him God was going to build a community of believers around him. Little did I know, he had become a part of the body of Christ, the largest community of believers. After that, across the auditorium, I saw a crowd gathering, and I immediately went, "What? What's that?"

I didn't want to even begin to hope for what that crowd could be, for fear that hope would be shattered. As I walked over there, I saw Cajua first, tears rolling down his face. His expression.... destroyed by God's grace. And as I got closer, there was Jeremy, his face a mess, tears all over, and as I glanced down I saw his casts were off and that he was on his feet. Could it be? But there was no doubt. I gave them hugs, crying out, thanking God. I had a prophecy long ago that said I would witness miracles... then Jeremy was healed. The words I prayed over Jeremy, originally, about him running, walking, and flying were actually mocked in that moment by someone, jokingly, saying, "Well, maybe not fly." It was only when I got home that I stumbled across this verse:

Isaiah 40: 21 Do you not know? Have you not heard? Has it not been told you from the beginning? Have you not understood since the earth was founded? 

22 He sits enthroned above the circle of the earth, and its people are like grasshoppers. He stretches out the heavens like a canopy, and spreads them out like a tent to live in... 

28 Do you not know? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom. 

29 He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. 

30 Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; 

31 but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.

It is for this reason I write, to tell the mercies and faithfulness of God, and the story has only begun. What a faithful God we serve!

Soli Deo Gloria,
Stevie Parris